The Age Guide: Perspectives on the Aging Journey

Caregiving with Compassion: Memories Through Music

• Age Guide • Season 1 • Episode 9

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We want to shine a light on the commitment and dedication of the more than 44 million family caregivers who take care of loved ones, providing 4.7 million dollars’ worth  of care every year.  A family caregiver is defined as an individual who cares for a loved one with a short-term or long-term disability or illness. Also known as an informal or unpaid caregiver, they provide invaluable care to those who need some degree of ongoing assistance with everyday tasks on a regular basis.

Sometimes a Caregiver isn’t full time or hands on, sometimes it’s something that fills in the gaps and creates a connection with the outside world. In this episode we’ll be shining a light on the Music and Memory program, a program that connects seniors with dementia to local high school students by sharing music from their era to help invoke memories and allow communication between older and newer generations. 

Check out Namish's podcast "5 AM Hustle Podcast" on all streaming platforms.

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SPEAKER_00:

Hello and welcome to The Age Guide, perspectives on the aging journey. We are here to be your personal age guide and enhance your quality of life on the road ahead. While it can be rewarding, caregiving isn't easy. Age Guide is committed to supporting caregivers through supportive services like training, respite, and resources. Often what caregivers really need to carry on with their role isn't complicated or intensive. Sometimes it's just something that fills the gaps and creates a connection with the outside world. In this episode, we'll be shining a light on the Music and Memory program, a program that connects seniors with dementia to local high school students by sharing music from their era to help invoke memories and allow communication between older and younger generations. This unique music-focused program provides numerous benefits to participants and their caregivers. Our second guest is Nimish. Let's listen in as he shares his unique and heartwarming experience volunteering in the Music and Memory Program.

SPEAKER_02:

Hi, Namesh. We're so happy to have you on this program today. We've heard a lot of really good things about this music and memory program that Age Guide funds. And I am excited to hear a little bit from you about what this program is all about, how you got involved in it, and what your experience was.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, for sure. Thanks so much for having me on. So yeah, my name is Namesh. I'm an incoming sophomore in college. I also played the flute for about 10 years and now am a vocalist. I sing. And so yeah, I went to Neuqua Valley and that's where the music and memory program, that's where I found it. And basically the crux of the program is... mentoring younger students involved in the arts with older individuals with either dementia or some form of Alzheimer's or a different degenerative disease. And it's essentially its purpose is to explore the the impact that music can have on somebody with alzheimer's and dementia because from a neuroscience perspective music is the last part of the brain that goes when it comes to alzheimer's or dementia and so our goal is to help heal certain families certain individuals through music and pull out music from their childhood that they really enjoyed listening to and see whether it can help them heal in some way, whether it be healing their families or having them talk about their memories, et cetera.

SPEAKER_02:

That's really an interesting sounding program. So you were a music student, you were in high school at Neuqua Valley High School, right? So what made you want to get involved with this program?

SPEAKER_01:

So I always had a little bit of a interest in neuroscience to begin with. And so that was part of it. But also I just wanted to be able to give back to part of the community that I was a part of. And I was incredibly passionate about the arts as well. And so that seemed to be a really nice intersection of all of those interests and understanding how... like how impactful it can be post high school when maybe you're not playing music every day, or maybe you're not necessarily a part of like a band or orchestra, but it can still be a part of your life.

SPEAKER_02:

Excellent. Very interesting. Tell me a little bit about who you were paired with. So my understanding is that they pair a music student with an older adult who has some memory issues, and then you kind of team up and talk about what kind of music they're interested in. Is that right?

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, a hundred percent. Um, so I was pregnant for Hannah. Um, she was an elderly Indian woman, um, who was suffering from dementia. Um, and she was, um, like her story was she moved to the States, um, with her husband, uh, late, maybe like early sixties, late sixties, uh, post, um, India's independence. Um, and, uh, Yeah, essentially moved to the States, made her life here. Hasn't really gone back in a little bit, but she had an interest in movies from like the 40s and the 50s and the soundtracks of those movies. And so we were able to talk about that a little bit. And just because of her dementia, like she just preferred to speak in Hindi and I'm a Hindi speaker at home. So it was a nice, nice pair of, yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

Did that just happen organically or did the leader of the program know that you spoke Hindi and match you up with her?

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, yeah. So Mr. Staley kind of asked around because she indicated, Farhana indicated a preference of just having someone who could speak Hindi. So he kind of went around just asking, like, does anybody speak Hindi? Like, would it be comfortable speaking Hindi with a person with dementia? And so I was like, yeah, I mean, I've conversed with a lot of people in my family. So it was like, yeah, of course.

SPEAKER_02:

That was perfect. So were these movies that she liked and the music that she liked, was that in Hindi as well?

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, yeah. So the way there's something different about Indian culture as opposed to like American pop culture is a lot of songs of the era are defined by movie soundtracks. And so songs that are on movie soundtracks are typically songs that go on the radio and like are popular and everyone knows about them. So you can kind of define someone's music taste by the movies that they watch or listen to or enjoy. And so that's kind of what we did with her. We were like, who's your favorite actor? What kind of movies do you like by him? And then like narrowed it down that way to like finding what particular songs she would have really liked.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay. So then the goal was to produce like a playlist for her, right? Right. Did you meet with her for like, how long did you have to meet with her to get to know her, her opinions and her taste in music?

SPEAKER_01:

We met her a couple of times. It was through Zoom. because of the pandemic. This was two years ago, right? So yeah. Yep. Yep. Like high to the pandemic. Yeah. But yeah, we met through Zoom and we essentially, I want to say we met a couple of times. And yeah, I just talked to her about her life and like what India was like pre-independence because she remembers part of that. And like, it's just very, very interesting to hear about stuff like that. Yeah. what her life was like growing up, what she would do for her free time, et cetera. And then from there, we figured out, would you even watch movies? And she was like, yeah, I went to movie theaters and stuff. And yeah, and so from there, we kind of created the playlist of like 60s and 50s songs slash movies of her favorite actor. And yeah, yeah, pretty much. That's how it went.

SPEAKER_02:

Was it then hard to find the right kind of music for her?

SPEAKER_01:

You know, once she kind of narrowed it down to like what movies she enjoyed, it honestly wasn't incredibly difficult. just because like there's a very certain genre defined by actors and defined by types of movies. And so after that, we kind of went to like, oh, this actor's like hit movies and those like hit songs. And so yeah, from there, it wasn't incredibly difficult just because it was a little more streamlined of a process, right? As opposed to like, if you're talking to someone who grew up in America, they might be like, oh, I like country music and you have to go down this whole rabbit hole. So yeah, we got a little bit lucky with that for sure.

SPEAKER_02:

So you met with her a couple of times, then you went off and you looked for the music. Then did you run it by her first or did you just like present her with a playlist or how did that unveiling work?

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, we pretty much just presented her with the playlist. We made sure the first couple of songs and then were like pretty big hit songs for her time. So like, even if she wasn't actively listening, because like back then you just play whatever's on the radio. Right. So like, she like should just make sure like we knew like what the radio hits were and like what was being played in the street and stuff. And so that definitely brought back a lot of her memories from her childhood of like playing with her cousins when she was super young and going to the movies with her family and everything. And so that was really cool to see. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

So how did she respond when she first heard the playlist?

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, she just started talking a lot about her childhood, specifically playing with her cousins, specifically. And you could tell she was kind of in her own mind, going through a lot of her past, and it brought back certain parts. I mean, we all have that experience, even though people that don't even have dementia, listening to a song can bring you back to a moment, to bring you back to an experience, especially if you haven't heard the song for a very long time. And that's definitely what I witnessed her go through. And she's talking about, you know, like hearing about like Gandhi, while like when India gained independence and hearing about all these other historical events that happened during her time, as well as just being a kid and having fun with her cousins and before like she got married and moved to the States and everything.

SPEAKER_02:

Wow. So did you see a little bit of a change in her personality and her memory as she was listening to the music?

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, 100% her face just really lit up. And it was really astonishing to see because you always hear about it, but you don't really believe it until you see it, even if you think you do believe it. And yeah, you can see her face light up with like enthusiasm, excitement, like all those emotions that are associated with her memories.

SPEAKER_02:

Was the program what you expected it to be or were there some surprises? Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

I think there were just some surprises that came with being in Zoom that, like, none of us could really anticipate. You know, technical issues, stuff that was really out of our control, right? Technical issues, right? Not being able to, like, actually be there physically to see, like, her react to it. But, yeah, beyond that, there was nothing where I was like, oh, this is, like, weird or out of the ordinary, right? I think necessarily just practice well to understand all different situations of what could happen. And it's not like we were just, even through the Zoom camera, it's not like Farhana was just by herself. She had her family members with her, kind of like guiding her through that experience as well. So there was that too.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh, okay. Good. Yes. We're actually doing this podcast as part of a series that we're doing about caregiving, which might sound like an odd fit, but the music and memory program really has a lot to offer to caregivers as well as the individual older adult participant, because I was looking on the music and memory website and they were saying that, you know, for people who are aging at home and in the community and their caregivers, research really shows that favorite songs, can provide some respite, can give a break to the caregiver because the older adult can spend a lot of time listening to that music and be really thoroughly engaged with that. And it's engaging their brain and all of their senses. So it's really good for them. And the caregiver can maybe step away and have a little bit of a break for a little while. And it can help ease some transitions are sometimes hard for people with memory loss and music can be a way to kind of smooth the rough edges on difficult things like transitions, and then it can really help to reduce stress, both for the individual again, and for the caregiver to be listening to some of that music in the background as they're doing some of their caregiving tasks. So I think what you did is really powerful in providing not just Farhana, but her whole family with some music that they can talk about together and engage with some memories with her and maybe give the family a little bit of respite too.

SPEAKER_01:

Right, for sure. I think there's a lot of unseen effects that you just won't be able to get because you won't be around for a while after that. But I totally agree. I think there's a shared experience there that even though I won't be a part of their lives again, probably, they're still able to provide that at least in that moment. And yeah, I really do appreciate that experience for sure.

SPEAKER_02:

So there wasn't a ton of follow-up. It sounds like you just kind of presented the playlist, you got to see her reaction, and then you didn't have an ongoing relationship or anything, correct?

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, not really. And I just think the pandemic made that difficult, to be honest. I mean, I do know, like, even for Hannah, I was like, oh, like, after this is all over, 100% come to my place for some tea and everything like that. And like, yeah, she was very, very kind for sure. But I think because of the pandemic and specifically for me, the chaos of moving out of my hometown, moving to a different college. To go to college, right. Things just get lost in the process. The phase of life.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah. But that's really wonderful that just for that moment in time, you were able to really connect on a very sensory level and provide something that changed lives. Would you recommend this program to others?

SPEAKER_01:

Oh yeah, 100%. You don't really need to know much about music to be a part of it. You don't need to know much about neuroscience or dementia or anything like that to really be a part of it too. You just have to care about other people in your community and care about people with Alzheimer's or dementia and their families. So, yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

And be willing to engage and do a little research and put together a playlist, right?

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, that's all. Yeah, it's really not that, it's really not incredibly difficult, but it changes someone's life. So that's really important.

SPEAKER_02:

That's awesome. I'm so glad you got involved with this and it just worked out so perfectly that you were paired with a Hindi speaker who really needed you to be there to translate and to find the right kind of music. I guess we talked about this a little bit, but was there anything that we didn't cover that you got out of participating in the program? I mean, I know it was very beneficial to Farhana and it was probably kind of fun for you, but what were some key takeaways for you?

SPEAKER_01:

I think one key takeaway was just someone who is very much so completely different, but grew up in a different reality than she did and just so much younger just objectively than Farhana was. I think it's just really interesting to see Because that's something I can't fathom right now is being at that stage of my life. And I'm sure she can't really. I'm sure she can't because she's been through it. But that's something that I can't really fathom right now. But I think it was super interesting just to see... what like your like close family could be like later in your life and like what um like how much she's been able to accomplish because she's but she's done massive feats moving across the country starting over or moving across the world starting over building a family and these are things that not everyone is actually able to do and able to pull off and she really did and they're comfortable um and so that was definitely one key takeaway um i think it's also just really interesting to like listen to people's stories um and she had a very interesting story, a story of partition and struggle because when India gained independence, India and Pakistan split up into two countries and it was a very bloody event in which people moved across both sides of the border that not many people know about. And so a lot of the families from North have that story of partition and struggle. And so coming from that to moving across the world to starting her family again is something that is like really remarkable and definitely something that like I can use as inspiration for sure.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, she sounds like a really inspirational woman.

SPEAKER_00:

Now that we have learned about our guests and who they are, we want them to walk up the steps, grab a microphone, and get on our Age Stage. This segment allows a soapbox-like platform to speak to the aging community on any topic they want to shine a light on. On Namisha's Age Stage, we will talk about some key takeaways from the Music and Memory program. Let's listen in.

SPEAKER_02:

So what would you like to use this platform to share with us?

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, I think it's one thing that's incredibly important. It just happens to be music related, but it's the arts funding in schools. I know Mr. Staley, he's like, pseudo-retired is really big on that as well now. But I think that that's something really important and something that every time I do have a platform, I'd like to like plug that specifically is making sure that the arts stay funded in schools because I think it was incredibly important for me. And I distinctly remember, I think it was, it wasn't Mr. Staley, but it was a colleague of his that was talking about how in World War II, JFK, or sorry, FDR, put funding into the arts just because something like the arts is able to lift the morale of everybody and encourage creativity. And there's just so much that you gain to learn from that experience. And it doesn't have to be a traditional band experience. It doesn't have to be a traditional orchestral experience, but feeling that community, learning about that discipline, And seeing something through to the end, I think is incredibly important for every young person to have, whether it be like an individual music experience or like a group music experience. I think if the arts stay funded in schools, there can be so many different outlets where you can take that beyond just the traditional band orchestra experience. And that's just not for somebody. So I think that's incredibly important. And that's going to be my platform awareness thing.

SPEAKER_02:

That's excellent. That's a really good cause. And like you said, it touches so many areas that there's definitely, I mean, I can definitely see the connection to aging services as well, just because of not just your participation in this program, but intergenerational support. music programs, that's just so powerful to be able to connect a younger adult with an older adult and be able to talk about and have a common language. And so, music was your common language as well as Hindi, right, when you went with Varhana. And I think it's because you were able to participate in this through your high school, which was funded that you were able to do this. So that funding for music programs, that's a great platform to have, Namesh. I like it. And I understand that you have a podcast of your own. You want to tell us a little bit about your podcast?

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, yeah. So my podcast focuses on self-development and entrepreneurship for a younger audience. Our goal is to um help individuals transform their lives into what they um would like for it to be because a lot of young people have an end goal in mind but really no idea how to get there um and so that's kind of our goal is to help people um transform their lives younger people specifically into what they want um it's called the 5 a.m hospital podcast um although um It will be changing pretty soon. So make sure you follow us on socials pretty quickly. If you can follow on Instagram, that's the tag. It's just the name of the podcast. And we are everywhere on all platforms. So,

SPEAKER_02:

yeah. Okay, great. We'll definitely share that in the show notes and we'll give it a listen ourselves. Thanks for sharing, Namesh.

SPEAKER_00:

Thank you for listening to The Age Guide, Perspectives on the Aging Journey. We hope you learned something new on this podcast because we all have a stake in promoting a high quality of life for people on their aging journey. Age Guide coordinates and administers many services for older adults in Northeastern Illinois. We serve DuPage, Grundy, Kane, Kankakee, Kendall, Lake, McHenry, and Will Counties. Our specially trained professionals are available to answer questions and connect you with local service providers and resources such as the Family Caregiver Support Program, which provides valuable resources for those who are giving unpaid care to adults 60 plus or to someone with Alzheimer's disease or a related disorder. The program includes caregiver resource centers, respite services, gap filling services, legal services, caregiver counseling centers, training and education resources, and support groups. If you are interested in these services or want to learn more, go to our website at hguide.org. Call our offices at 630-293-5990. Please follow our podcasts so when we post our monthly podcast, you are notified on your streaming account. Thank you, and we will see you next time On the Age Guide, perspectives on the aging journey.